My whole life has been a tissue of lies… :(

I just found out that there are 13 zodiac signs according to NASA, and all the dates have changed. I spent my whole life thinking I was a Sagittarius, but as it turns out I’m actually an Ophiuchus, which sounds very much like something that you’d cough up out of your lungs when you’re sick. First I was a bad ass centaur archer, and now I’m a great big nugget of lung butter. Freakin’ wonderful. 😛